Just then you feel your right foot being bitten hard.

    It's the woodchuck!

    "Agh!" you shout in pain, collapsing onto the mulch pile.

    Poppy returns with the hoe raised above his head, ready to strike.

    "Dad!" you shout.  "Woodchuck!"

    You point over to where the woodchuck is burrowing into the ground with a piece of your foot still in its mouth.

    "Nice try," says Poppy.  "I've heard that one before."

    He swings the hoe down and it lands right between your legs, inches from your nads.

    You grab onto the end of the hoe.

    Incensed, Poppy jerks the hoe back upward, and you go flying some fifteen feet into the air, belly-flopping onto BOOG's old truck in the back driveway.

    You look over at Poppy, still in the backyard with his hoe ready to strike.  He can't seem to see where you've gone, though.  Silly old man.

    Just then you hear a car door open from underneath you.

    "Brad!" barks BOOG.  "I just fixed this truck up!  Then you belly-flop it?!"

    "No, but-- I, see--"

    BOOG takes your body and crumples it roughly into a ball.

    He walks over to the backyard to where Poppy's still holding the hoe and looking around for you.

    "Hey, Dad," says BOOG, "you up for a little stick ball?"

    "Now you're talking," says Poppy.

    BOOG winds up and lobs you right into Poppy's sights.

    Years of watching baseball on TV pay off for Poppy.  He swings and connects solidly, knocking you high up into the air.

    It looks as though you're going to clear the house.

    But nope.

    You crash through roof.

    It's ruled a double.

    "AAAAAAAAAAGH!" screams Sarah, ass-nekked in the bathtub, as you smash through the ceiling and land head-first in the toilet.

    She hucks a shampoo bottle right into your crotch, but at this point it doesn't even matter because...
 

Your final score is:

15