Dude, you're not even wearing pants!

    But you're so distracted that you don't even realize that fact, and wind up removing your undies.

    "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!" screams Sarah.

    She hops out of the tub and bolts past you and out of the bathroom.

    You are pushed forward by her wake, and fall into the bathtub.

    You sit there for a while, soaking, playing with your new pet.  Petting it.  Splashing it.

    Then a few minutes later, Pam walks in the door and throws a large dictionary at your head.

    "Bastard!"

    It knocks you unconscious.

    ...

    You wake up later that night.  But the giant poop is gone!

    You check the toilet, but it's not there.

    Somebody did take a piss, though.

    You go downstairs and find that Uncle Bud is there visting.

    Uncle Bud?  "Hmmmmmm..." you think to yourself.  "Maybe that was a human head you saw in the toilet earlier."

    "Just get out of the tub?" asks Bud cloaked in his Gorton Fisherman yellow slicker.  "You're all wrinkly."

    You look down and see that he is correct.

    "Uh, yeah," you reply.  "Have you been in the bathroom recently?"

    "Why do you ask?"

    "Just asking."

    "Let me give you some advice, Brad.  Don't stick your nose where it doesn't belong."

    "Admit it.  It was you in that toilet!  You jumped in there and morphed into a poop when I barged in!  I know about you and Sarah, Uncle Bud!  I know all about you!"

    "You know nothing," says Bud.

    He raises his right hand and it morphs into a long thin needle.  Before you can react, he thrusts it into your brain.

    "You will forget what you saw," he says calmly.  "You will forget it all."

    He laughs evilly and removes the needle and you...


    Black out.

    Lose consciousness.

    Fall asleep.