"Merv," you say.  "I challenge you to a duel."

    "The hell are you talking about, Marty?" says Merv.

    "A duel," you repeat.  "It is the traditional way in which two gentlemen settle a dispute."

    "Oh, yeah," says Merv.  "I heard of them."

    "The victor shall get the next place in line," you declare.

    "OK," says Merv.  "That sounds fair.  Now, what's this duel?"
 


    "Ten paces.  Turn.  And jizz."

    "Slapsies."

    "Your call."